I'm deeply impressed by people who take risks. And I'm not talking about reckless risks that put your life in jeopardy or hurt others or are rooted in the motive of impressing others. I'm talking about the risks we take when we step into a place where we know we're going to have to humble ourselves to others. The places where we know we're the students. The places where we know very little and still go. These could be literal places but they could also be projects or jobs or churches or small groups or organizations or leadership roles.
I've noticed the people I want to spend my time with are those who are fully convinced God is for them and has a purpose; they don't require the details. There is a magnetic quality to a heart that lets God be God. I am captivated by people who have a loose grip around what they love most knowing God has held it all since the beginning.
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If we're being honest, I still deeply desire the details most of the time. I'm such a planner. I like to know the end goal. I like to know the trajectory of a project or plan or relationship. Don't get me wrong, planning is important.
What I'm seeing as of late is the tightness of my grip on the elements of my life not only reveals its significance, but my level of trust in God with it.
Our grip on plans and goals and dreams and relationships and money and careers reveals our faith in God.
If we're still being honest, I've got a death grip on a couple areas. I've also had blindspots that prevented me from seeing this sooner. There are areas where I trust God because I have no other choice. There are other areas where I feel more "in control," therefore I've kept a death grip on it hoping to create it into something I want (or think I want). How easily I have forgotten that the One who knows me best has created a plan for my life that is more fulfilling than anything I could create on my own.
I'm spending these next few days attempting to release the parts of my life that mean most to me--career, dating, this project, a book idea-- back to God.
I'm remembering it's the same God who saved my life as the One who's asking me to hand back the details.